When organizations say no, some parents start their own

When Cami Teacoach sought volunteer opportunities for her 3-year-old son in Pittsburgh, most organizations declined. She responded by founding VolunTOTs, a group that creates service projects for children as young as 3. Participants pack 500 boxes of groceries to distribute to families in need, play bingo with seniors in nursing homes, and make dog treats for an animal rescue center, among other projects.

“Everyone was like, ‘A 3-year-old can’t do that,’” Teacoach said. “And I was like, ‘No, I swear, he really can if you would just give him a chance.’”

Teacoach said parents have reported improvements in their children’s conduct after service experiences. “They feel so good about themselves, they were a helper, and that translates into better behavior,” she said.

Children can handle structured tasks

Nonprofit directors said children can be effective volunteers when given age-appropriate work.

“I’ve been very impressed with the detail-orientation and the precision and the following of directions and the care that some kids I’ve seen, as young as six, take to the tasks that they’re doing,” said Sapreet Saluja, executive director of New York Cares, which works with organizations to develop volunteer programs in New York City. “And in many cases, they’re more detail-oriented than the adults, which I think is very inspiring.”

Children excel at activities such as sorting coats, packing groceries, and following through on tasks, Saluja said.

Long-term habits built early

Aviva Davis was about eight years old when she and her brother Brendan began helping their parents deliver Meals on Wheels to senior citizens and medically frail individuals in Denver. Initially they rode in the car and helped bring food to the door; as they got older, they took turns driving. Davis, now 17, still does monthly deliveries with her parents and said she became a resource at school for fellow students seeking volunteer opportunities.

“It definitely opened my eyes to what the world is like outside of our bubble,” Davis said. “But even at such a young age I could realize it’s amazing what we’re doing that we could help people that aren’t as lucky as we were.”

Her father, Seth Davis, said the shared routine has provided something rare. “It’s a great chance for us to catch up as a family,” he said. “When we’re not all on our phones, you get some pretty cool quality time.”

Building social skills through service

When Stephanie Bernaba’s son Matthew was in eighth grade and needed to complete a school service project, the family started “Tough Cookies” — baking and delivering cookies to veterans.

“Going up to the houses, it was very nice, because they’re mostly living alone. A lot of their family or friends died,” said Michael Bernaba, 14, a freshman at The Prout School in Wakefield, Rhode Island. “It’s just nice to be there and bring it to them … They were very happy, especially for someone to bring them treats like that.”

The project helped the teens encounter people at various stages of life and health, Stephanie Bernaba said. Matthew Bernaba, now 15, said the experience helped him overcome shyness. “For the first couple of deliveries I was more to myself, and as we kept going, we talked more with the veterans and got to hear great stories from them,” he said.

Practical guidance for families

Experts recommended involving children in selecting a cause rather than assigning one.

“Let them know what problem you’re trying to fix in your community, and maybe one or two options of how that problem can be fixed,” Lagana said. Giving children a choice — food insecurity or providing blankets for hospitalized children, for example — builds investment in the outcome, she said.

Families can also create opportunities that pull in their own communities. Bonnie Davis organized a drive for menstrual supplies, with neighbors gathering in her backyard to assemble baskets. She also turned half of her son’s graduation party into a volunteer project assembling kits of bean soup.

“It’s a win for everybody. You get quality time, you’re raising your children with what feels like good values, and people benefit,” she said.